I cried in the bathroom four times in the last week. It was a rough go at parenting, y’all. (Also, Mother’s Day can suck it.)
Each time, I felt it coming on, and I’d excuse myself from whatever I was doing, head to the bathroom and sob. Felt every piece of sadness and misery and frustration. All of it. All said and done, each event lasted less than five minutes.
Then I cleaned myself up, and went on about my day. And guess what? I actually had a great week. My kid and I had a ton of fun, I had a lot of wonderful things happen, and all in all, I’d call it a win. (Not a bad price to pay for 20 minutes of crying, if you ask me.)
Wait, what? I thought you said you cried in the bathroom four times?
I did. It’s true. Because I am a whole person, with many likes and dislikes, many emotions, many talents and many things I suck at. Sometimes I cry; sometimes I laugh so hard I almost pee my pants. Sometimes I love people and sometimes I hate them. Sometimes I get up really early, and sometimes I sleep in. I am a diverse human being.
Embracing the wholeness is where it’s at.
Picture this. A red rubber ball from elementary gym class. When fully inflated, it bounces and rolls easily. But, when it’s soft and deflated, it’s challenging to direct it, or for it to get much momentum.
So, even though the red rubber ball is whole in both situations, the inflated version of whole is the most powerful.
Now picture that you are the ball. You are complete, just as you are. Are you inflated and bouncing along, or are you droopy and needing lots of pushing to get anywhere?
A word about inflation. (But not the money kind.)
The ball doesn’t automatically inflate just by taking on more air. It comes from allowing the air to reach more places within the ball. If you want to become a buoyant, bouncing ball that sours on a clear path with joy and zest, you have to allow the air [energy, life] that enters the ball [you] to reach all the parts of you.
It really is that simple. The part that’s challenging is getting out of the way so that can happen.
When you are whole…
- Your frustration and anger is as beautiful as your joy and love.
- You free up all the energy it takes to bounce a deflated ball.
- You free up all the energy that has you filtering yourself and putting on masks, trying to fit, trying to be something/someone.
- You feel more relaxed because you don’t have to worry so much about what’s appropriate or right.
- You can be seen fully.
- You feel more at home in yourself.
Confident, brilliant, and inspired.
I wasn’t always so confident. I wasn’t always so in touch with my emotions. I didn’t know I’d ever not care what others thought. I wasn’t always this way.
This isn’t about having a particular personality. This is about growing into all the parts of you.
When meeting people who ask about my story, I often start with something along the lines of, “In the last seven years, I’ve become an entirely different human being.”
It’s funny because it’s true. In the best way. But all I really did was inflate the ball. I didn’t dye it blue, I didn’t put sequins or bumper stickers on it. I just inflated it.
And I’ve been asked to share more of the story with you, so I’m going to!
You’re invited to join me this Saturday, May 25, at 11:30 a.m. PST.
If you’d like to join in, send me a message here, and I’ll pass along the link.
I promise it’ll be uncensored, unfiltered, and un-something else. Oh. Boring. It will be un-boring! (There will also be some time for questions at the end, too.)
Looking forward to seeing you there!